The Good Feeling

x

x

x

I'm a very happy person at the moment. And I'm even more happier that I can say that.

The birthday party of my best friend was a success. I met new friends. They actually are the friends of her brother but we both get along with them very well. I don't like her brother much but that's okay as long as I don't have to deal too much with him. Two of them I declare as very good friends and one or two as good acquaintances.
It is awesome, I found new friends I totally like, who are similar to me, with whom it's fun to be around, who have matching ideas and who show me new things. I'm freer, I go out more often, I have a better relationship to my best friend.
It is strange how fast I came to trust them, how fast and willingly I let them in my life. I also wonder - I'm fascinated how they let me, us in their lives, without prejudice or caution. I guess it simply is like that when you're really good with someone. It feels as if we've spent our whole lives together and known us for a long time.
Overall, there's also another possibility these two boys like me too much and I'm not sure how I'd feel about that. Clearly not as scared as I used to.

Anyway, it feels so good that I've now got three best friends where my long-time best friend kind of left me before. That this happened seamless like a smooth transition. It's so wonderful to know that there are not only two knights in shining armours ready to help me when I'm down. I'm going to stop talking about that now, otherwise I'll glorify that too much.

x

x

But it's cool how happy I am. I'm going to start studying in three weeks, a subject that I didn't even plan to. But it'll work somehow, my study will be a catastrophe but after that I'll have a good life.

I spend the whole summer very well - traveling and resting. It felt so good to relax after five though years at school. At my grandparents I woke up late, took a short cold shower (! - never did that before, simply to please my grandma), read, went swimming, ate, read again, watched TV and slept. One day I even went to the lake in my nightgrowns. And barefoot. That was one of my best mornings.

I now know that I'm not totally wasted. That two months can help me to be okay again, maybe even just one. I now know that I'm still okay, after all the damage school and love did to me. I now know that I still can be happy at some time after all.