The First Free Spring Since A Long Time

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So ... well yes. I'm nearly finished. One more oral exam to go. And then ... then I'll leave school. Yeah, adulthood ...

No, but really, I look forward to autumn. I look forward to meeting new people, I look forward to learning something different, I look forward to being at university and yes, I look forward to moving out someday. My mum still freezes every moment someone mentions something like this and refuses it very loud at once. I don't know, I want to be free, I want to have friends to come over in the evening and meeting someone when I want. Yes, I think I mainly look forward to being free.

Ha, I never actually thought that it would turn out like that. That I turn to one of these early nidifugous birds. But, to stay realistic: Moving out won't happen very soon. Not only because of my mum, more likely because there is no money for that.

So yeah, autumn. That's the word I use for not saying "going to the uni". I don't say "... when I start study", I say "in autumn". I also made a decision - wow, yes, I know, something I didn't even believe in anymore. I've got my subject, I haven't got an university yet. Two are in the run.

I've got way too much free time. I don't know what to actually do. I bake a cake. I watch TV. I wrote some news. I'm on tumblr. Well, these are just some of the things I wanted to do.

I'm not ready to write yet. I don't glamorise my tumblr as I wanted. Well, we'll see. I still got plenty of time and hopefully I will be ready to write after my exams.

This post is so confusing, I think. I don't even know what I write but it felt like I needed to do an update, at least because of the time. Well, I tried to post some things in the past month but I wasn't able to put it into the right words, or didn't manage to remember it. There are plenty "post corpses" in my drafts (nice weather, outer appearances of boys, things I wanted to write about). And I think they will stay there.

I can't make a clear sentence in my head and my hands type bovine. Maybe that's why I'm not ready to write yet. We'll see.

Oh, I nearly forgot: It's spring! One week ago it was pretty bizarre because the only thing which was green was the grass and looking out of the window was strange seeing the still bald trees. But now, the brushes are green, some bloom, and some trees like beeches already have their first leaves. And it's wonderful because the sun shines and it's warm at the same time. On Sunday it's said to be cold again but I think, we're going to make a barbecue tomorrow.

(The background green is really disgusting. Gonna change that asap.)